26 February 2012

C, E-flat, and G go into a bar

My daughter e-mailed this to me. It was so good I had to post it here.

C, E-flat, and G go into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry, but we don't serve minors." So E-flat leaves, and C and G have an open fifth between them. After a few drinks, the fifth is diminished, and G is out flat. F comes in and tries to augment the situation, but is not sharp enough. D comes in and heads for the bathroom, saying, "Excuse me; I'll just be a second." Then A comes in, but the bartender is not convinced that this relative of C is not a minor. Then the bartender notices B-flat hiding at the end of the bar and says, "Get out! You're the seventh minor I've found in this bar tonight." E-flat comes back the next night in a three-piece suit with nicely shined shoes. The bartender says, "You're looking sharp tonight. Come on in, this could be a major development." Sure enough, E-flat soon takes off his suit and everything else, and is au natural. Eventually C sobers up and realizes in horror that he's under a rest. C is brought to trial, found guilty of contributing to the diminution of a minor, and is sentenced to 10 years of D.S. without Coda at an upscale correctional facility.

25 February 2012

I'd Like a Mass with Sacred Music Please

For the most part, I don't like praise & worship music. I like music that praises and worships God, but I don't really like the genre of praise & worship music. A few artist can pull it off, like Glenn Kaiser, Steve Bell, and, of course, John Michael Talbot. (Petra's pretty good at taking praise & worship music and making it into rock music, but then it isn't really praise & worship music anymore.) Aside, from these, and maybe a few others I'm not familiar with, I think praise & worship music sounds awful. To me it sounds like very poorly done secular music with religious lyrics.

Another type of music I don't like is religious folk music. Again, to me it sounds like very poorly done secular folk music with religious lyrics, even when it's done with an organ (I think with an organ it qualifies as a new genre).

What kind of music do we get at a Roman Catholic Mass? I can't say I've heard much of anything except praise & worship music, religious folk music, and even religious rock music. There have been some exceptions, particularly at my cathedral and some of the music at Easter Vigil, but they are very few.

What kind of music would I like to hear at Mass? Sacred music.

24 February 2012

end "its" life

One of my pet peeves is so-called "inclusive language." It's not inclusive but exclusive. God the Father, God the Holy Spirit, and even God the Son before the Incarnation, are neither male or female (of course, God the Son is a male now that he took on flesh), but we say "Him" and "His" because in English, like many other languages, the masculine form does double duty and can refer to one or more males, or, to a mixed group or an individual of unknown sex. This is called Standard English.

So-called "inclusive language" came about because some people wanted to push a political agenda that says men and women were the same. Note, I did not say, "equal dignity," but "the same." Of course men and women have equal dignity, but they most definitely are not the same. For instance, men can have all the immoral sex they want without the risk of getting pregnant. The people that pushed so-called "inclusive language" wanted women to have the same immoral sexual freedom, so they legalized contraception and abortion. That's right! The same political agenda that gave us legal contraception and abortion also gave us so-called "inclusive language."

18 February 2012

Private Papal Jet

There are many people that look down on the Catholic Church because of what they perceive as great wealth (I tried to counter this misconception four years ago in my weekly thought, The Riches of the Church). One person I have corresponded with over the years is fond of pointing out that the pope has the most expensive car in the world, the "popemobile." Actually, there are a number of popemobiles. The popemobiles are expensive, but they are hardly the most expensive cars in the world. I'm guessing the fleet of presidential limousines are just as expensive, if not more expensive. I know that Airforce One is much more expensive than the private papal jet.

Cardinal Collins receives berretta and ring

I've been waiting and praying for this day for a number of years:

16 February 2012

Barbara Boxer: Insurance rights trumps religious rights

Senator Barbara Boxer has been trashed by some pro-life activists lately regarding an example she gave about the possibility of, as the Washington Examiner put it, "a dangerous precedence of religious rights trumping the right to be insured." I agree 100% with the validity of the example Senator Boxer gave; however, the conclusion is wrong.

This is a quote from the Washington Examiner: